Here are questions in the spirit of Alan Watts—designed to dissolve the assumptions you didn't know you were making:
What would you be if you stopped trying to be something?
You say you want to "improve" yourself—but who is this self you're improving, and who is doing the improving? Are they the same person?
If you are not your thoughts, not your memories, not your name or role—what remains?
Why do you assume the "you" of next year is the same "you" sitting here now?
What are you trying to force that would happen naturally if you got out of the way?
You're gripping the steering wheel—but have you noticed the road is already taking you somewhere?
What if the hard work you think is required is actually the obstacle?
Can you hear how much violence is in the phrase "I need to push myself"?
You're planning to be happy later—but when has "later" ever arrived?
What are you postponing that you could only ever do now?
Why do you treat the present as a stepping stone to somewhere else? Where else is there?
If you knew this moment was not a rehearsal—that there is no performance coming—how would you be in it?